another 'Economic Stimulus' payment is coming!

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Don Ferrette

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Sometime this year, we taxpayers will again receive another 'Economic

Stimulus' payment. This is indeed a very exciting program, and I'll explain it by

using a Q & A format:

 

Q. What is an 'Economic Stimulus' payment ?

A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.

 

Q.. Where will the government get this money ?

A. From taxpayers.

 

Q.. So the government is giving me back my own money ?

A. Only a smidgen of it.

 

Q. What is the purpose of this payment ?

A. The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a

high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.

 

Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China ?

A. No Comment. (official government response)

 

Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the U.S. economy by

spending your stimulus check wisely:

 

* If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart, the money will

go to China or Sri Lanka ..

 

* If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to the

Arabs.

 

* If you purchase a computer, it will go to India , Taiwan or

China ..

 

* If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico ,

Honduras and Guatemala ...

 

* If you buy an efficient car, it will go to Japan or Korea ..

 

* If you purchase useless stuff, it will go to Taiwan ...

 

* If you pay your credit cards off, or buy stock, it will go

to management bonuses and they will hide it offshore.

 

Instead, keep the money in America by:

 

1) Spending it at yard sales, or

2) Going to ball games, or

3) Spending it on prostitutes, or

4) Beer or

5) Tattoos.

 

(These are the only American businesses still operating in the U.S. )

 

Conclusion:

 

Go to a ball game with a tattooed prostitute that you met at a yard sale and drink beer all day !

 

No need to thank me, I'm just glad I could be of help.

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
 
Last edited by a moderator:
Sometime this year, we taxpayers will again receive another 'Economic

Stimulus' payment. This is indeed a very exciting program, and I'll explain it by

using a Q & A format:

 

Q. What is an 'Economic Stimulus' payment ?

A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.

 

Q.. Where will the government get this money ?

A. From taxpayers.

 

Q.. So the government is giving me back my own money ?

A. Only a smidgen of it.

 

Q. What is the purpose of this payment ?

A. The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a

high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.

 

Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China ?

A. No Comment. (official government response)

 

Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the U.S. economy by

spending your stimulus check wisely:

 

* If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart, the money will

go to China or Sri Lanka ..

 

* If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to the

Arabs.

 

* If you purchase a computer, it will go to India , Taiwan or

China ..

 

* If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico ,

Honduras and Guatemala ...

 

* If you buy an efficient car, it will go to Japan or Korea ..

 

* If you purchase useless stuff, it will go to Taiwan ...

 

* If you pay your credit cards off, or buy stock, it will go

to management bonuses and they will hide it offshore.

 

Instead, keep the money in America by:

 

1) Spending it at yard sales, or

2) Going to ball games, or

3) Spending it on prostitutes, or

4) Beer or

5) Tattoos.

 

(These are the only American businesses still operating in the U.S. )

 

Conclusion:

 

Go to a ball game with a tattooed prostitute that you met at a yard sale and drink beer all day !

 

No need to thank me, I'm just glad I could be of help.

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
Or.... Like Will Rogers once said: The best way to double your money is fold it in half and put it back in your pocket. :)
 
We need a registered therapist to report to off-topic IMMEDIATELY....

good laugh Don....
 
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